Monday, May 16

The Rikers Island Grand Prix Will Save Formula One And New York City

Image for article titled The Rikers Island Grand Prix Will Save Formula One And New York City

Image: Google Maps

If you’re from New York or have ever watched a single episode of Law & Order, you are intimately familiar with Rikers Island. The much beleaguered prison complex has been an albatross on the city for years now. Now, there’s even the possibility the Department of Justice could take it over due to NYC’s mismanagement.

Prisoners and guards cannot be kept safe, people are there who shouldn’t be there and corruption runs rampant. Needless to say, Rikers Island is a hell hole that really needs to be shut down sooner rather than later. But, if Rikers was to close, what would happen to the land?

Well folks, I’ve got an idea. And it’s a good one. The Rikers Island Grand Prix. It came to me in a dream just 10 days ago.

For those who don’t know, Rikers Island is located in the East River between Queens and The Bronx. It’s one of the most populated areas of the entire world, and a great place to hold a race.

No this isn’t a shitpost – it’s a funpost. And no, I’m not high.

Image for article titled The Rikers Island Grand Prix Will Save Formula One And New York City

Photo: U.S. Geological Survey

Hell, when there isn’t a race it can be used for track days and events… owned and sanctioned by the city. It’ll get street racers off public roads and give them somewhere to go. It’s perfect. Eric Adams, that stupid idiot, is gonna give me the key to the city with how much money this thing is gonna make.

I’ve even got some names for corners and sections:

  • The Mayor Abe Beame Bend
  • The Lower East Side (of the track)
  • The Bodega Back Turn
  • The David Dinkins Double S’s
  • The F Train Is 7 Minutes Away Straight
  • The Hill de Blasio

There are many, many more, and please feel free to drop your ideas in the comments as well.

I think F1 and sports car racing would be all for this. I mean it’s New York City, baby. Who wouldn’t want to hold a race here? It’s 15 minutes from Manhattan and only five if you’re an oligarch in a helicopter.

Just look at the twists and turns of the roads on Rikers. They could certainly make for some fun and compelling racing. There’s also plenty of configuration one could make with the track to keep things spicy. Hell, it even has elevation changes on the east side! It’s 417 acres of untapped potential.

I don’t know guys. This idea is so brilliant it just may work.

Reference-jalopnik.com

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